W.I.P. Critique

    I came here looking for some good critique on thigns I am working on and things I have completed. if you got a moment look these over and post some comments. Thanks in advanced for the feedback.

    bms_crossfire: This is the first level I started to work on for Black Mesa Source. I have many redone versions of this level but this is where it is currently at. I have done a little bit of retexturing to make things look a better, but other than that not much has changed.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/bm_crossfire/full/crossfire_01.jpg]

    gg_autumn: Autumn is a level I had thought up and concepted right after finishing Factory. The level only took about 2-5 days to complete. The level is a set of 4 bunkers in the woods during autumn. It's specifically setup for the Gun Game style of gameplay for Counter Strike Source.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_autumn/full/gg_autumn01.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_autumn/full/gg_autumn02.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_autumn/full/gg_autumn03.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_autumn/full/gg_autumn04.jpg]

    gg_factory: Factory was a level orginally designed to playtest some unique game play items I was working on. I got hooked on playing the Gun Game server mod for Counter Strike Source and decided to convert it over. The level was based off of a power plant in Philly, and was modified to work with the unique gameplay the Gun Game offers. Total construction time was around 2 weeks, and then it was play tested and sent out to the public.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_factory/full/gg_factory01.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_factory/full/gg_factory02.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_factory/full/gg_factory03.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/gg_factory/full/gg_factory04.jpg]

    dm_rust: Rust was my final level for the Half-Life 2 Capture The Flag project. The level was used to introduce players to the new game play mode, Domination. The Level was designed off of the canal area from Half-Life 2 and pushed to have an extremely opened and frantic style of game play . The Domination mode was set so the teams would have to fight for the one flag in the center of the level and then hold it for as long as they could. The problem rested in the fact that you were safe no where and always had someone behind you.... Which isn't a bad thing.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/dom_rust/full/dom_rust01.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/dom_rust/full/dom_rust02.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/dom_rust/full/dom_rust03.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/dom_rust/full/dom_rust04.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/dom_rust/full/dom_rust05.jpg]

    Environments/Models: These final picture are High Poly models. One is an environment I started to do in 3DMax, the other is a low poly model with a normal mapped applied. I am also looking for thoughts on these too.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/models/full/model_factory.jpg]

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/levels/models/full/model_transformer.jpg]

    Thanks again.

    I love it.. actually I really do I think this would be an awesome map for HI.. even though thats not what you are mapping for and any game too would be nice to play on it..

    I have no idea what is wrong with it seeing how I am a fairly new mapper but as far as eye candy goes.. it tastes delicious

    *edit*

    on further inspection I do not get why there are wires going to those lights in outside on top of the building.. and there is a lot of square architecture on the buildings.. maybe add lights or awnings? I dunno.. its your map and you can do w/e you want with it just exploring the realm of ideas ..

    Agreed on the square part with Ryukolink, there could be more variation. I think outdoor parts lacks a bit depth too, the last one lacks vertical depth at least. Factory one looks pretty nice, even tho there's a lot of crates around :wink:

    Hey, nice to see you posting here mate

    My main comment is you need to go to town on 3D skyboxes, particularly for gg_autumn, and even more desperately, dm_rust. That map looks pretty cool but the open sky area is so huge and the roof line is so flat that it looks unrealistic. With an interesting 3D skybox (especially if combined with more detail/structures above the current roof line) that could be alleviated.

    I really like the look of the crossfire remake - I've seen it before but I think it must have been an earlier version as I don't remember liking it so much before

    Quote from ReNo

    Hey, nice to see you posting here mate My main comment is you need to go to town on 3D skyboxes, particularly for gg_autumn, and even more desperately, dm_rust. That map looks pretty cool but the open sky area is so huge and the roof line is so flat that it looks unrealistic. With an interesting 3D skybox (especially if combined with more detail/structures above the current roof line) that could be alleviated.

    I really like the look of the crossfire remake - I've seen it before but I think it must have been an earlier version as I don't remember liking it so much before

    Yea, or some height variations among the buildings to begin with.

    gg_factory reminds me more of a train stationg than a factory The big windows, the bright ambience..on the other hand you say it is based of an actual plant and I haven't seen the reference pics

    Some more detail on the columns wouldn't hurt maybe, more love to the lighting and effects, overall I can see the room being fun though.

    gg_autumn looks rushed. The cliffs look very artificial, being all at one height, the layout looks pretty simple. You say it took you 2-5 days to complete and considering this it's not bad..but maybe less levels and more effort putting into one would be good? dm_rust looks promising!

    I think it would help if you decided on an exact theme for each of the maps, and went to town on adding the thematic elements into them. For example, dm rust (which looks really cool by the way), reminds me of a quarry. A quick search on google images brings up so many quarry images and things that could be turned into props. Diggers, cranes, conveyor belts, rocks, coal, strange machines etc which could all convince the player that they are running around in a quarry.

    This is just an example of course, but nailing the theme, and then putting the stuff in that people would expect to see in such a place could really help. If it is a factory for instance, what does the factory make? What would we see in this type of factory?

    First off thank you for all of you replies, and a lot of you have gave very valid points. I have to run out for a bit, but when I return I will write person reply back to everyone.

    Its all pretty damn good looking. The problem with your map surely doesnt imply a lack of skill, far from it. Its the "idea" youre trying to convey with the environment.

    One thing though, its very square. It might be becuase of the gameplay/the mod, but id try to make it less blocky/simetric in the looks.

    Ryukolink: Thanks for the complements. I have not played HI so I don't know about it's gameplay, however I am sure it's a lot of fun As for the input of the awnings etc, very good idea, it would make the building stand out a little more and obvious give it a realistic push.

    Teeluu: I do agree that some variation aloen would give it some more depth, as for crates in Factory, the GunGame mode of play is all about fast action and cover, and I realized one of the best ways to get cover was the cliche crates. It doesn't look too bad, but I can clearly see where you are coming from.

    Section_Ei8ht: Glad to see you are still alive, it's been awhile since we have talked.

    Minotauro: Thanks for the comments man

    Reno: He man glad to hear from you, it's been awhile. I looked into Outerlight but unfortunatly they are a little too far away . Love the ship though. As for the skyboxes I know Rust could use an ice one. Industrial like and perhaps a C17 styled mix with it. Autumn has a skybox a 1:1 scale cause of the tree models, but I guess hills etc would have made it better.

    FrieChamp: GG_Factory was made off of a few shots like this one

    [Blocked Image: http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y64/RedDragon0719/RPS/Power%20Play/IMG_1096res.jpg]

    There were other ones I cannot find right off of the bat, but it had other photos, it's actually another room I got the big arch ways off of.

    Autumn was rushed. I wanted to make a level for Gun Game that looked good in a short amount of time. The levels for Gun Game are really easy to make because of their simplistic layouts. I do agree though more cluiff faces would really have poped out it's boring horizan line.

    Rust was a map mapped ahiwle ago for HL2:CTF that I think now I am going back and trying some CSS textures and putting a hint of HDR in to make things pop. I never overly push this through out the whole level cause I think it can ruin a map. as a matter of fact I think the shot of autumn was tuned down after I took it, though it had a decent dreamy effect.

    OrnateBaboon: I usually think of a theme or an idea in my head an go. Sometimes I work off of a simple sketch or photo. I do agree if I would have modeled some things for Rust to pop out more it coudl have had a better effect, however it was for Hl2CTF so it needed to have that HL2 feel to it. I do agree with your comments on Factory, I think it could have been pushed a lot further and actuall had some pipes and machines in it.

    Von*Ferret: Thanks for the compliments, can't wait to hear what you got for me.

    BlackPanther: I do think some of the environments are a little blocky, but Some of my reference clearly implies a lot of blockiness. I think if I had more variety in here it might make it better.

    Thanks again for all of your comments if you got more, I'd love to hear them. I am going to put up a few more shorts shortly.

    That can be a good and bad thing. I think it's cool to show what you can do with default materials, however I think having your own sometimes makes your maps stand out a little more. I am going to be doing a whole environment in Max with all custom textures, so I am hoping it turns out good.

    Very nice stuff. Crossfire is superb, and the mapping standard on a whole is very high.

    My only criticisms would be, firstly in Autumn - the rocky sections have 2 distinct levels and are a bit rounded-box-like, and it looks a bit odd.

    Also in Factory - I think you need to break up some of those big expanses of plain concrete texturing (on walls/ceiling in particular) , even if only by adding some structural detail to the textures, or adding more grime overlays etc to break up the uniform clean look. A few extra pipe/cable props here and there wouldn't hurt either.

    Quote from atrocity

    FrieChamp: GG_Factory was made off of a few shots like this one[Blocked Image: http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y64/Red…IMG_1096res.jpg]

    ive seen this before. here is another take on this scene by a fellow mapper. hope it serves as some inspiration for you. http://littlelostpoly.co.uk/images/gall ... /nd039.jpg

    btw. i think that crossfire is probably your strongest map atm. i wouldve liked to see a slightly different take on it but i guess you decided to stick as close as possible to it for the blackmesa mod. still looks good though

    Quote from Sa74n

    ive seen this before. here is another take on this scene by a fellow mapper. hope it serves as some inspiration for you. http://littlelostpoly.co.uk/images/gall ... /nd039.jpgbtw. i think that crossfire is probably your strongest map atm. i wouldve liked to see a slightly different take on it but i guess you decided to stick as close as possible to it for the blackmesa mod. still looks good though

    Now there's a great map!

    Well I can't deny that level designer did a great job with that. I think if I had the models or textures, well time too I could have achieved a simlilar effect, but going through game design school has not given me a lot of time to work on levels recently.

    For the people who commented on crossfire thanks for the compliments, there are a lot of changes I have been making to the level still, because a lot of it looks uniform or in some cases doesn't make sense. I also have been doing gasworks which has some custom textures and models. I will be releasing screenshots after Black Mesa's next media release.

    [Blocked Image: http://atrocity.vertexninjas.com/ref01.jpg]

    That's the actuall photo I went off of. It's a room similar to the one I posted but has cooler pillars and more interesting architecture all around. I really like the person who did the other rooms work obviously pretty well done.

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