Quote from madsenfkDisplay More1 hour ago, madsenfk said: So, I've been dealing with pretty bad anxiety and REALLY BAD self-hatred for like a 1 year now, which I've grown pretty tired about tbh. All this self-hatred started out as an inside joke between me and my close friends really, which eventually over a few months made me realise how many things there's actually wrong with me, in comparison to other people with like the perfect lives, looks and shit etc etc.
Let me give you guys some examples on what I think is wrong with me:
- Rock bottom self-esteem
- Anxiety
- No social life, besides school (most of my friends prefers to just chill over discord and play games, so It's pretty hard to plan something)
- Looks (not really face, more like from the neck down. Been trying to go to the gym, but I simply do not have enough motivation at the moment)
- Negativity
There's more I'm sure, but can't think about it right now.
Basically all the things above have fucked my sleeping, and fucked my school work.
So, if there's any experts on this sort of thing, then I could really need some advice, before I actually need to go to therapy and turn my life around for real.
I think we've all battled that exact same thing in here, in one way or the other. I sure as hell did in various stages of my life. I'm sure people would argue with me on this, but I've developed the opinion that I think it will never go away, which is a really scary thought. "Will I have to endure this pain for the rest of my life?" The good thing about it though, is that once you acknowledge the existence of a problem, it's the first step taken towards knowing how to analyse it, rationalize it and ultimately find ways to solve it.
For me, my low self esteem developed into very specific irrational fears. Impostor syndrome attacks many of us, we're all scared shitless that people around us will realize that we're the frauds we think we are. The reality is, it gets better once you realize that we're all just winging it here man, we have no idea what we're doing, none of us do. Some of the people that I've looked forward the most in life turned out to have very low self esteem, the diference is they found ways to work around the problem instead of trying to swipe it under the rug. The thing about the mind is that there's no point in hiding from it, you'll be better of tackling the areas you want to improve dead on. Know thy enemy.
One of my favourit authors Robert Greene (who really helped me become a better human being) said that every single one of us have distinct DNA, you're the first one of your kind and you'll be the last, make it count. We need to learn to harvest that uniqueness, usually the best artists and people of power discover and learn to explore that.
Also, remember to exercise regularly, fuck motivation just get off your fat ass and hit the treadmill and specially weights! The testosterone will do wonders for your mind and your body and eat well while avoiding sugar like the plague. So remove that fucking signature and go be the hero of your story!