Going crazy at work, need help!

    I'm going crazy at work and I could really use some good and serious advice. Here's the situation:


    I've got a good and well paid job. Within our team I'm responsible for the rosters and for coaching people. I have flexible hours, I can work from home, I have free digital television with all the channels and lots of benefits. Sounds awesome right? It should, but unfortunately it isn't.


    About two years ago, they decided to turn a skill into a full time job. Instead of giving people the opportunity to apply they thought it was an good idea to form the team based on who worked the most hours when it was still a skill. Sounds reasonable except for the fact that a lot of those people are really incapable of actually doing the job. Fast forward and we have half of the team on an improvement plan without any actual improvement in sight. I'm very limited in what I can do with coaching and about half of the team is not only incapable but they don't care because they get away with everything.


    Last month I caught one committing fraud. I reported this and after this was brought to his attention, we caught him again with fraud. So far as 3 times in total. Our management didn't act and he simply got away with it. This changed something in me. Getting this guy fired became an obsession. Constantly cleaning up after people is one thing, but cheating, getting away with it while others get punished is something I apparently cannot handle. I told this to my manager, escalated it and the only thing that happens is that improvement plans keep getting prolonged. Besides this there are no other consequences for fraud or performing badly. As an example, we've got people who continuously have 15-35 feedbacks a month while the average is around 3-5.


    Because of this they decided the entire team needed an improvement plan. A lot of time and thought went into this and today we had a evaluation meeting. The shit hit the fan. Not only are none of the agreements we made being carried out by everyone, the managers also got mad because we had such an negative attitude. When we said this is because there are no consequences to not performing things rapidly went from bad to worse.


    I'm at a point that I'm not objective anymore. Anything that comes from one of the incapable people (good or bad) immediately makes my blood boil. I don't want to work anymore and when I'm free I'm depressed that I have to go back. Which really makes time off rather useless. I'm sick of people not being capable, I'm sick of having to work with them, I'm sick of nothing changing, I'm sick of not seeing any consequences for those people, I'm ashamed to be a part of that team and most of all I'm sick of managers nothing having the goddamn balls to kick some people out (I know this is not easy but trust me, I've supplied them with enough examples to fill a small library).


    I know what you're thinking right now, GTFO, except that leaving this place is not an option. I'm selling (hopefully) my house with an unavoidable huge loss and there's a baby on the way. Besides, no one will pay me as much as I'm getting here (not meant to brag, just stating this as a fact). There's an suspected merger coming up so finding a new job within the company is also not an option for the time being. Simply put, I'm stuck. I'm taking this shit home with me, it's effecting my personal life and I don't know what to do anymore.


    I've got nothing to lose by posting this here but I really hope that one of you has a suggestion on how to make the best of this situation. How to deal or cope with it. Running isn't an option and I can't escalate it any higher up. How can I detach myself from this, with seeing all the feedback as a coach (giving this up would be a good start but I don't want to do that because of the previously mentioned fraud)? Or even more basic, how do stop caring about the people and the mistakes and the job in general? I need something to get me through until I can find something else internally (hopefully within 6 months but probably not). Any good advice would really be appreciated and if you got this far, thank you for reading!

    This sounds like a perfect time to find a hobby!

    Nobody at your work gives a flying fuck, so neither should you since you've made the adequate efforts to improve the situation. Time to pick up chess, fitness, level design, fuck it play online poker at work. This is a time to grow yourself because your work environment is not going to be contributing to your personal growth.

    Quote from Buddy

    What is the company actually about?

    I want to thank everybody for taking the time to read it and reply. Office Space is an good example I suppose (without burning the place down). I think I have to do what FMPONE said and just stop giving a fuck. Which is difficult for me because I'm the kind of guy that really wants to do something as well as he can or not at all.

    Chainsaw, that is some very deep stuff right there.

    Buddy, I work for a cable company (tv, Internet, telephony) as a trafficer. Monotoring incoming traffic, finding problems and communicate them internally and externally.

    Anyone else has some thoughts to share?

    Quote from Pampers

    If someone is committing fraud, shouldn't you contact the authorities?

    Did I use the wrong word? I mean altering his numbers to make it look as though he's done a better job.

    Yeah, then its a wrong word. You can't do much about those dicks, I would propably also bitch about it a lot but in the end that's how things go and not much to be done about it I'm afriad.

    Read a book about buddhism. Not to become a buddhist but to learn about serenity.

    I always try to apply some of the philosophical aspects that i picked up from it. Not getting overexited when good things happen and staying calm when bad things happen. Makes for an overall more bearable life.

    I guess you want to do good and meaningful work mate, and that's an honourable feeling. Thing is, when you are in such situations where you feel more implied than you should, remember that for one you are not responsible of the bad recruitements the company does to deserve itself by crapping down the team morale; second it's not your money in play, if the direction wants to run things badly that's their responsibility. Third, you signed a contract that stipulate the article of your work, you are paid a salary for it, and don't earn any share of the benefits of the company; so it's all good to do a bit more if the company provides a good working environment and is honest with you, otherwise keep it strictly to that contract. But be honest with what you signed.


    And for your coworkers, they are just dogs in suit and tie fighting for the scarce golden bones they are being thrown at, don't fall into that, you have better things to do than fight against mills.


    I think indeed you should run away if it's affecting your personal life and your relationship with the future mother of your child, the coming of a child is a very stressful moment i guess, plus it's in these moments that companies know they can do whatever they want with the future parents as they are financially stuck, i'm not a dad myself but it would be cool if some of the veteran dads from mapcore could give you some advice

    Quote from Steppenwolf

    Read a book about buddhism. Not to become a buddhist but to learn about serenity.

    I always try to apply some of the philosophical aspects that i picked up from it. Not getting overexited when good things happen and staying calm when bad things happen. Makes for an overall more bearable life.


    That sounds more like a recipe for boredom, and it also sounds like something that will teach you to be someone who you're not. Why not getting excited when good things happen? If you're happy, fucking explode about it, let yourself be immersed in the good vibes and pour it somewhere nice, like be productive at work, be it personal or professional, or share it with someone you love.

    As for the bad things, I like to believe they're there to test you in life, staying too calm about it might be easily mistaken by ignoring the issue, where the way I see it, you should control it, yes of course but should also use the anger to focus on finding a solution for the issue.


    Also Sprony, in regards to happiness in the workplace, there's 3 different "stages". You're either happy, which is awesome and rare, or you absolutely fucking despise you're job for many reasons or you're in a OK job, pays the bills, get's you going.

    The latter is the worst to be in, because there's nothing you can do about it, there's not enough motivation to do anything about it, you kinda settle ok as being just, ok? I know MANY people in this situation, years go by and they kinda just go with the flow and kinda gave up on seeking happiness or keep climbing the ladder, they just live day by day in this weird limbo state.

    The extremes are the best since if you're happy, you're happy, if you loathe you're job then eventually you'll be doing something about it and you'll use that motivation to find a better situation for yourself.

    I would also say that there is such a thing as having a low pressure gig, a gig that you can pay the bills in and fly under the radar. Its a lot like having a talk show at 3am in the morning, nobody is watching, nobody really cares, but if you are fine with cashing a check at the end of every month it might not be the worst thing in the world.


    A lot of people can't eat. Just saying. (I don't recommend this kind of a job unless you're OK with flying under the radar, I myself probably wouldn't be, not really my style)

    Again, thanks for the new insights. For the record. I'm grateful for having a good job in times like this especially since so many haven't. I like the work too. Great place, loads of friends. So in all I know I can't complain really. It's the team and managers that mess it up. I merely need to find something that let's me deal with that.

    If this situation is affecting your relationship because you haven't talked to your girlfriend/spouse yet, have a distensive discussion with her, explaining how you are feeling and why.

    I guess you probably scouted the market already, but keep at it, you never know someting will come up... it will also keep you busy and with your mind elsewhere. I guess.

    As per what to do, the posts above said it, and i think FMPONE summed it up perfectly in the first post. You must try to be waterproof and let all this fly over your head.

    My dad is a teached and for years continued to send letters and submit reports and nothing ever came out of it. He's just holding on trying to get to retirement I wish he had some hobby to keep his mind away... luckily he started going to the gym and now they seem they can't do without, but other than that he just watches movies and fiddles with the iPad all afternoon/evenings.

    Quote from (HP)

    That sounds more like a recipe for boredom, and it also sounds like something that will teach you to be someone who you're not. Why not getting excited when good things happen? If you're happy, fucking explode about it, let yourself be immersed in the good vibes and pour it somewhere nice, like be productive at work, be it personal or professional, or share it with someone you love.

    As for the bad things, I like to believe they're there to test you in life, staying too calm about it might be easily mistaken by ignoring the issue, where the way I see it, you should control it, yes of course but should also use the anger to focus on finding a solution for the issue.


    Serenity is not to be confused with apathy. For me it's a way to avoid things like emotional rollercoaster ride, depression and unhealthy anger.


    What i mean with not get overexcited when good things happen is to accept that moments of luck and feeling super happy don't last forever. If you get desperate and on the constant hunt for such moments chances are that you spent more time being miserable and depressed because in most peoples lifes such moments are the exception not the rule and brain chemistry hasn't evolved in a way that it spills out luck hormones constantly anyway. In the end such a state of mind can lead to drug addiction or alcoholism.


    With bad things the key is to not let them eat you up. Don't get agitated about some petty bullshit, wasting your nerves and health on it etc. For instance my parents they fight or throw tantrums over the most stupid shit like a spilled glass of water or a broken plate. Me i just clean it up and buy new plates if necessary. I don't let such things ruin my mood. Or say a random stranger on the street insults me. When i was young such an occurance had my brain spin for days. Nowadays i already have it forgotten after an hour.

    Another thing is that as a matter of principle i don't envy people over status, money, material wealth, relationships etc. That also used to be different when i was younger and falls in the category of bad things that "happen to you" if you tote around such feelings.

    That's nice if you really can let things go. But if you only keep calm on the surface and internalize the frustration you just become passive aggressive.

    Yeah, that makes sense stepp. Words I definitely identify with!


    Quote from Dejavo

    That's nice if you really can let things go. But if you only keep calm on the surface and internalize the frustration you just become passive aggressive.


    Yeah, that's sorta what I was trying to say, but, it really varies depending on your personality I guess.

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