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Tyker

Robin-Yann Storm - Level & UX Designer

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I heard this was a good place to get hardcore critque.

The portfolio is at: http://www.rystorm.com/

I've heard of people who really liked this portfolio, and some who disliked it. But it usually stays at an opinion, without feedback.
I don't think I've ever seen a portfolio that please everyone. With that in mind: Could you give me constructive feedback, and tell me what your current job is? That way I can angle the portfolio towards those kinds of people that will probably look at it! 

Thanks!


 

Edited by Tyker

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Heyyy dude ! 

Antoine here nice to meet you :). Jr. Level Designer going to work at Compulsion Games on We Happy Few in a bit. 

This portfolio looks awesome ! Nice explanations of the development of your maps, clear concise stuff. The feeling that I get though from some of the CG:GO level explanation pages is that it's very art focused somehow. Like, if I take De_Meat for example, you've two nice screenshots at the top. It's cool that you have pics to show the feel of the level but later down there's plenty more that may or may not achieve to explain how you thought of this map design wise. What I feel is that the explanations are more geared towards letting others know about your technical process rather than explaining what your design intentions were. I think the first thing people would like to see from a designer (after your flavor screenshot and the process explanation) is an annotated top down map. You've got one but I'd nudge it higher than the pack of screenshots because it's more designer-y. It's where people can understand what your design intentions were for the map, like... This is the sniper area for these and these reasons and this is the choke point and so on. A video explaining that is always a winner because... people are lazy and reading is hard lul. 

I think that changing curriculum vitae to Resume would make your menu stuff more punchy. I don't think a lot of people use "Curriculum Vitae" (or maybe it's a dutch thing ?). In your resume, I've always been told that experience is a much better thing to put than education. So I would nudge your experience up and put education down there somewhere, maybe after skills and before your interests. In there I would try to find a way to say that you've shipped 4 titles and worked on consoles too. It's a pretty awesome thing to mention, It's like... automatically this guy knows what he's talking about. Right ? Your downloadable resume is a little different. You've got an intro paragraph in there that's pretty cool but I would reorganize your enumeration of cool stuff that you did. Rather than putting mods first I would put 4 shipped titles there, worked on consoles, did talks at GDC, showcased stuff at E3 and did some mods. I actually missed the download link, maybe because of the mute color ? I know it's like right under the title, but my attention when directly at your information for some reason. 

Hope that can help you :)

Edited by SuperDuperYeah
Forgot the Jr. next to level designer.

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Thanks! That is very useful and constructive feedback!

You are right that it is very visual focused at the moment and can use more design visions and explanations. Heatmaps, concept whiteboxes, etc. I'll work on this!

And good catch on the enumeration! I wrote it down chronologically, but you're right that it's better to put up front what actually sounds the best. 

Thanks again!

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The first paragraph/ first page is where you can best communicate "this is why you need and want me", so basically you're looking to punch them in the guts with your victories within the first few seconds.

I would advocate for adjusting your landing page: 'Robin-Yann Storm, excellent level designer', your links, and a hero image (of you giving a presentation, or an excerpt from your best project).

And generally adjusting the language a little (though this is a cultural consideration):

eg "below is a small selection of videogames..."

Sounds like a low sell (again, depending on the culture it's aiming at) and I think you'd be better off leading with a 'fine' or 'distilled' selection of your best work.

This, after all, is your greatest hits album.

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