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Thrik

What's going on with your life?

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It's good you realize that you're in a bad situation and that you're taking steps to move out. I do want to leave you with one piece of advice. Let the past be the past. This advice might not even apply to you. However, I've seen too many people that realize something, start digging and go down hill from there. Now I'm not saying you should ignore your problems. But if they're oblivious for you and you already have enough incentive to change your life (based on how you're treated), just let it go. In some cases, ignorance is truly bliss. 

 

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I never pictured you as a teacher. But I get where you're coming from. That's my biggest fear, ruining my daughter. Because you're spot on regarding kids these days. It's ridiculous. Also the whole attitude towards upbringing pisses me off. Parents and teachers can't do shit anymore. We're raising lazy, fat and weak children. I'm not saying you should abuse your child but they have to know there are consequences. I only got hit a couple of times by my parents but oh boy did I deserve each and everyone of them. 

 

The same goes with respect. It might seem trivial to some but for instance, I was at a family gathering. New people were coming in so they go around and greet people by shaking there hands. Multiple people (not only kids) didn't even have the goddamn courtesy to stand up when someone wants to shake their hand. 

 

Last but not least, the lack of discipline. Give me money for that, I want this now, I want...I want... You get the point. You want something, you work for it. Can't work yet? Safe your allowance. Want more allowance, help around the house. Nothing is free in this world and the sooner kids learn that, the better. Sometimes I'm eating with friends and there kids don't eat this or that. No, they get a separate meal of what they want to eat. WTF? When I didn't want my vegetables, I didn't get any food until I ate it. It's so simple. Parents getting bossed around. 

 

Nah, we're gonna do it different. I will go to the end of the world for my daughter but she will learn respect, hard work and discipline. One way or the other. Also, she isn't even born yet and the media already tries to tell you what you're child can and cannot see or do. They want to shelter them from everything and make them completely oblivious to anything. Sorry media, we'll decide whether or not our daughter is ready to see some a certain movie, wear make up, go out, etc.

 

Sorry, rant over :)

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My wife and I are moving in with my parents :P

Just for a month or so :D!

Tbh, can't wait to leave Boston and go back home to see family and friends again. Also, I plan on building a bookshelf from scratch... or maybe a nice table... we will see... my dad has every tool known to man in the garage.

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My wife and I are moving in with my parents :P

Just for a month or so :D!

Tbh, can't wait to leave Boston and go back home to see family and friends again. Also, I plan on building a bookshelf from scratch... or maybe a nice table... we will see... my dad has every tool known to man in the garage.

 

That's what I've done since I've been back from Japan. My parents have moved to a nearby gulf island and they rent the basement to a Finnish family. I pay about 1k rent but that's still a deal. We're gonna reconsider what to do in about 6 months when I've paid off my student loans and am finally debt free!

 

EDIT: Also the dad tools aspect is awesome. I'm finally starting to understand the male obsession with tools and building stuff. 

 

 

 

Also I built a standing desk today out of old cinder blocks and scrap cloth. 

 

2014+-+1

Edited by AlexM

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Been sat at the train station for 45 minutes so far because someone was hit by a high-speed train just outside it. Currently watching shitloads of police, paramedics, etc slowly going down a 12-carriage train looking for blood and remnants.

A reminder that no matter how bad life seems, at least you're not splattered all over a train and a mild inconvenience to a load of business people on their way home.

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If I wanted to tap out of life, and I admit I have a few times, I wouldn't want to do it in such a way like that. I don't want to be scraped off of the front of a train and have bits of me dropped into a plastic bag.

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I read this topic when it just started, but didn't notice until now how it evolved. I never could have guessed there's so many people out here suffering from depressions/anxieties/... which really touches me. I just finished reading every single post in this topic and thought I could perhaps make a meaningful contribution for some people.

 

 

Enlightment

 

Listen to Bunglo Dux (or anyone else). This is the key to fighting depression. You have to know, realize and accept the fact that your mind is out to talk you down. That's basically what the disease (regardless of the variation) comes down to. Your head messes with you and tries to convince you that you're ugly, worthless, etc. Always monitor this. You have to become aware when your mind starts messing with you. With practice, you'll start to pick up on this. It won't make you feel better but at least you know it's bullshit. The real danger is going a long with those thoughts.

 

When the above comes more natural to you it also becomes easier for you to ignore it. Yes, you'll keep struggling with it but you won't get carried away. As a movie geek, I always like to use movie examples. In this case "A Beautiful Mind" with Russel Crowe. In the movie he decides not to take his medicine which means he'll continue to see people who aren't actually there. He simply chooses to ignore them. There's a powerful lesson in that and it's exactly what Bunglo is referring to. 

 

Let me close with an example of how much a depression likes to mess with you. My wife and I tried for over 2 years to get a child. When it finally worked we're overjoyed but a couple of days later I was really depressed (welcome to the world of a manic). My head started to talk to me:"You see, you don't want a child because why aren't you happy?", "You're a bad dad because this is not what good dads do", "You don't love her, maybe you shouldn't be with your wife if you can't rejoice in having a child together". Untrained, one could get carried away with that and suffer the consequences. Trained however, you notice it and you realize it's that time again. Then you simply ignore it. The longer you ignore it the weaker it gets. Also hold on to reality. I knew the example above was bullshit because I love my wife and we've been through hell to get a child. Knowing that and hanging on to that makes the ignoring part easier.

 

 

This post somehow reminded me of NLP, short for Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Not sure how many (if any at all) of you are familiar with it, but it could be helpful for some of you guys (it sure did help me in some ways).

Here's a brief explanation of what it's about:

 

 

The Map is Not the Territory. As human beings, we can never know reality. We can only know our perceptions of reality. We experience and respond to the world around us primarily through our sensory representational systems. It is our 'neuro-linguistic' maps of reality that determine how we behave and that give those behaviors meaning, not reality itself. It is generally not reality that limits us or empowers us, but rather our map of reality. 

 

In short, it's about reprogramming the way you perceive "life", or literally any thing around you that somehow influences you.

I guess one of the most wellknown books about NLP is probably "Get the life you want" from Richard Bandler. I have it sitting on my shelf (but not really, it's packed because I'm moving in a few days), but I have to admit I haven't finished reading it yet, so I can't give any further comments about it.

 

I think this would be worth looking into for some of you guys, at least it wouldn't hurt and would still be better than taking medicines when you don't really need them. Don't hesitate to get in touch with me if you want to learn more about NLP (not an expert, but I could maybe give some pointers).

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Deep thread. DeepCore. Just read the whole thread and it's awesome that a lot of you can post so openly about the problems you've all had and I think it's great to see that there are a lot of people in the same boat who could help or be there to talk to.

 

It also makes me think of just how fortunate I am, as I've always had a very supportive family and not suffered any major setbacks. I can relate in a lot of ways to most of you, being the kid who was always shut in his bedroom for 16 hours at a time on the computer, not sleeping enough with grades slipping, bullied at school and being quite introvert I suppose. I don't think that is unusual of the type of person who works in our industry and really that changed when I reached 18/19 and went to Uni.

 

Everything you ever want can be accomplished by sheer determination and help from the people that love you. Because nobody can make it out here alone. Also, never be ashamed for being you or for your past. It has made you the man you are today. 

 

This is generally how I try to live my life. I'm pretty impulsive and headstrong, if there's something I want bad enough or want to do I'll go after it or have it. I try live my life by the 'life's too short' ethos because I don't want to get to a point in my life where I have regrets.

 

I should probably post about my current life. When I first started working at Codemasters I moved to Birmingham and rented a flat in the city centre, 10 minute walk from work which I loved for the convenience and how nice the flat was. After about a year of living here I realised that it was making me unhappy as I was spending every penny I earned on rent and bills and that was no way to live.

 

I moved out of the flat in with my girlfriend's mum about half an hour drive from work and I give her mum some money every month but I spend nowhere near as much money as I did in the flat. This meant I bought my dream car, my girlfriend and I get to go out more and do more activities together and I see my friends and family a lot more. They say money can't buy you happiness but not having any to spare can certainly make you miserable.

 

I love the projects I'm working on right now and I'm pretty content with where I'm at right now. Slowly saving money for a house and living life as much as I can. A pay rise would be nice though :)

 

It's good to see a thread like this, it's rare that people open up in this way. Good Job Mapcore.

Edited by Jord

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Standing desks are terrifying.

Standing desks spread like the plague. Our CEO injured his back while snowboarding and had to get a standing desk. Then we hired a guy to do QA and he wanted one as well (because he is old) and now our game designer is complaining about a sore back and wants one too. And we're just 6 people lol

 

Are standing desks really that great?

Edited by Skjalg

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Standing desks spread like the plague. Our CEO injured his back while snowboarding and had to get a standing desk. Then we hired a guy to do QA and he wanted one as well (because he is old) and now our game designer is complaining about a sore back and wants one too. And we're just 6 people lol

Are standing desks really that great?

 

My colleague has some serious back problems and a standing desk does help him a lot. I wouldn't want one myself but hey, if it helps people.

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